we are but we aren't really

I made a real, serious effort to get us back into "work" mode this week. I laid plans every night of the previous week and came up with a million and one projects and ideas of how and what we would learn. I included the children. Each of them got a meeting time and the chance to discuss what they wanted to do between now and Christmas.

Lapbooks on Penguins and Crocodiles for the boys, get better at Maths (this means not having a melt down every time the workbook gets opened) for OD.

This is what happened:

Tues
I got up at 6.15 am. Laid table for breakfast.
Children got up at 7.00 am, washed, dressed and ate breakfast by 7.45. No TV.
All seated at table with various projects out and equipment by 8.15.
Everyone works diligently until 10.30 am, break for snacks and a 10 min bounce on the trampoline.
11.00 am back to the table, finishing work in time for lunch at 12.30 pm.
1.30 pm - we all watch one episode of Crocodile Chronicles.
2.15 pm children play in the garden until tea time, I finish housework and manage to make soup and get the washing in before it rains.
Every thing is well ordered, well organised and runs like clockwork.
All children in bed and asleep by 7.45 pm.
Evening spent knitting and "watching" playmobil on EbaY.

Weds
Shrek cuts a tooth. all. night. long. Every one has a bad nights sleep and as a result, Shrek and I awake at 8.00 am to find the older three glued to the TV, where they have been for the past hour.

The next hour and a half is spent dragging them away from the TV, arguing about breakfast, suitable clothing and whether or not snorting is acceptable at the table.

It is nearly 10.00 am and I notice EB is still wearing his PJ bottoms. I roar at him and he runs upstairs to change into trousers. Every one else is at the table. MB launches his handwriting book across the table and declares it "boring". OD's bottom lip starts to wobble because she has been asked to divide an odd number. EB is supposed to be on Education City but when I check is actually playing Star Wars games on the internet. Another roar and the threat of PC removal until he is nineteen.

45 minutes later, I have had enough. I tell them to go watch another episode of Crocodile Chronicles, the phone is ringing, I am being constantly outbid on EbaY for playmobil I want to hoard for Christmas, and the baby is whining. DH phones to tell me the piano will be here in 15 minutes, the fire brigade are on the phone asking when they can come to visit the HE Group and my head hurts from lack of sleep.

Lunch is a packet of noodles, Shrek falls asleep. Time has lost all meaning. I am on the phone to another HE mum organising a meet up when I realise I have less than 5 minutes to put all the kids in the car and drive to the Optician. We are late. The Optician isn't very pleased. It is a supermarket Optician so after here we dash about trying to remember what we need before Shrek gets bored of the gingerbread man I broke out of the pocket. MB asks if we are going to go to jail because we are eating some thing before we've paid for it.

I feel like a failed mother. Cook a pizza and chips for tea. OD throws us all out of the sitting room so she can watch Wuthering Heights part two in peace, so we all end up in the kitchen.

I run a bath, all children get in, OD is depressed by Wuthering Heights, MB and EB want to watch more Crocodile Chronicles, and impress me by quoting lots of reptilian facts at me. Every one gets out of the bath, has a hot chocolate and a story (or five.) Downstairs to pick up the debris and oooh at the piano, which I can't play because it is past our self imposed curfew to keep the neighbours happy.

I have done no washing, no ironing, no hoovering, and nothing of merit what so ever.

My plan for a structured education lasted one day. ONE. As I pick up the lonely Lego man, the hair clips, the toy elephant all left on the kitchen table, I stop worrying about the structure, and the learning. They had fun today, amidst the chaos, and these days are precious, I tell myself.

Tomorrow is another day.

the cause of all the trouble.