home education :: the myth and the reality

When you tell people you home educate, you can never be sure of their responses.  The only thing I can say is consistent is the responses of other children who generally seem to think it is awesome.

 (please know that the pictures have nothing to do with the post, I just like them.)

What is consistent is the general lack of understanding of what home education actually means.  I am often asked how we manage to follow the national curriculum at home (which I now have a new natty reply "didn't you know that the new academies can opt out of the NC?") or whether my children will sit exams, do they socialise, and so on and so forth.

All practical concerns, and all worthy of debate.

Others who are maybe a little more informed/ crazy envisage days spent knitting, reading together and beeswax modelling.

There are days like these, maybe two out of three hundred and sixty five.

Would I like more days like these?

Not really.

 

The beauty of home ed is that we can choose to have days like these but most often we choose other stuff.

There is daily reading, but I don't schedule it in.  It is done when requested.  It isn't always a sedate affair either, especially if Mr Wah is reading.

We don't live in harmony.

There is regular arguments, and occasional fighting.  There have been black eyes caused by over enthusiastic trampoline play, and even a tooth knocked out of a big boys mouth by a littler brother.

In short, we're very normal.

There are beautiful moments.  When the sun is shining and we have the beach to ourselves and every one is smiling and happy.  These are the moments I hug to myself when the weather has turned grolly and I am stuck in the house with four children who have started snarling at each other.

I have one child who at the moment is constantly bored.  I can offer every activity in the house and he will sniff and turn his nose up and every one.

I have another child who would happily spend every waking moment at a computer screen, playing Roblox or Incredibots.   I would like to pretend that I don't have a problem with this, that I am a true unschooler but I do.  I really, really do.  I make him take food breaks and fresh air breaks.

I struggle to find one activity that will interest all my children, so diverse are their ages and interests.  We've been on visits to the Welsh Assembly, the National Library, the Arts Centre, the Lifeguards Club and at each visit at least one child has felt compelled to come and tell me that this is not for them.

There is of course the flip side.  Mb surprised both himself and me by becoming very passionate about politics whilst at the government buildings, and Eb and Od both had to chock back a tear whilst listening to the stories of evacuees at the National Library workshop.

I've been brave and told all my family that none of my children will go back to school unless they want to.  We are standing very much alone, as their reactions vary from indifference to out and out horror at how I am so bloody minded that I will wreck my children's future.

Home ed is hard work.  Do not be fooled.  Yes, you get to set the pace when they are smaller, and yes, you have a staggering amount of freedom but oh my, the responsibility can be overwhelming at times.  The pace also gets picked up as they get older, and I'm at a stage now where the big three all have clubs and lessons they want to do.

So, each week you will find me at piano lessons, violin lessons, swimming lessons, horse riding lessons, lifesavers, Jujitsu, art club as well as a multitude of one off events and social activities.  Best not to mention all the stuff we have going on at home.

We still manage to have two days a week that are completely at home, but it takes serious planning and strength to say "no" to other opportunities.

Does this sound like a moan?

It's really not meant to.  Having all the children at home is the best decision we've ever made.  I love my life and I know I'm lucky to be able to do things this way, and to live life on our own terms.  It's a huge decision, but once you've made it you realise that it wasn't such a big deal after all. 

I think that what I'm trying to say is this:  If you are thinking of home educating, do it.  Just don't expect it to be exactly how you planned it in your head, because children have an amazing ability to turn even the simplest idea on it's head and turn it into something wonderful, messy and all their own.

Also, don't read too many home education/ home schooling blogs.

They are a fantastic resource, and some of our best projects have come from them.  I've also left some feeling like an epic failure.  Comparison is a waste of time.  Take the good ideas and remember that every one has crappy days, just not every one chooses to blog about them.

So, over to you.  Whether you home educate or not, how do you deal with the reality when it doesn't quite match up to the myth?