sleep, sleeeeeeep, sleep!!

There is something on my mind.

Have you worked out what it may be?

There are many things about living out in the wild that I was not prepared for, and I've scanned many, many rurally based blogs and have found little mention of the myth that the countryside is quiet.

At night, it is a veritable sound buffet.

This enchanted me at first. I loved the whimsical hooting of the owls, the murmuring of the stream and the whispering of the leaves as the gentle Summer breeze rustled through them.

NOT NOW.

Now there is the howling of the wind, the tip, tip, tip as the sycamore seeds pelt the windows, the angry rushing of the water as it bursts the stream banks in its mad, frenzied rush to get to the big river and on, on, on to the sea.

Now, there is the owl that likes to sit outside my window and call.

Every. Single. Night.

This owl sounds like the most annoying alarm clock invented. No twit-twoo. Not for this beaut.

Instead, we have a long, shrill "Whoooodle, whoooodle."

Please understand that I am no expert on owl sounds, but let's say it sounds like an owl gurgling, and it likes to gurgle for long periods of time throughout the night.

Badgers have taken to snorffling through the orchard, which is very quiet to my human ears but apparently sounds very distressing to the dogs who have taken to barking at approximately 2 a.m. and 4 a.m.

All this noise and activity hasn't just woken me up, Lb has also suffered...except that he doesn't mind being woken up at four in the morning. He likes to get up, drink a cup of milk and get on with the important business of cutting up scrap paper.

My eyeballs feel like they are falling out of my head on day two of these antics.

I am considering shooting the owl, gagging the dogs and sedating the three year old.

I find myself standing trance like, day dreaming about the days when I used to go to bed at 11 and wake up at 7, having a full eight hours of lovely, snuggly sleep.

I love living here, but I'd love to sleep here a little bit more too.